whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
