I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
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