Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Randomize
