I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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