it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
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