i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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