If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
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