the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
it was like having sex with a tree stump
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
They have beer where we have blood.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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