so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize