No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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