Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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