a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
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