yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize