bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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