I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Farmville is her only friend.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize