He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
