The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
50% drunk capacity currently
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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