I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
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I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize