i always forget guys have bellybuttons
he thought i was a dude.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
