I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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