Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Randomize
