This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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