Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Randomize
