My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
