I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
