i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
