You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
