Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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