You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
True strength comes from lack of pants
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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