Midget sex pt 2 tonight
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize