Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
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