My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
