like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
