I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize
