I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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