I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize