so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
