i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont lie about slip and slides
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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