I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize