Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
