she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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