Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
