Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
