Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
it glows. i had to have it.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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