I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
