it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
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don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
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you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
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