There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
