Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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