ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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