Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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